By Hannah Byle
As a girl (especially a high school girl), one thing we all seem to hear at one point or another is
insults from other girls. They often are comments about our clothes, or bodies; telling us our
skirts are too long or too short, we wear too much or too little makeup; etc., or about our
personalities, we’re too loud or quiet, too flirty or shy. Whatever they are, we start feeling like we
can never win with each other, and we feel bad for our differences. While these comments
seem to simply be rude, the problem really goes much deeper, and these comments can
actually be very harmful, for several reasons.
The first reason is that a good portion of these girl on girl insults have to do with clothes,
makeup, hair, or body. When a girl insults another girl simply for her looks, she’s setting forth a
standard about what girls should look like. She’s essentially saying that all girls need to look a
certain way to have value; and those that break the mold deserve to be shamed. Differences are
seen as unacceptable. When boys hear comments like this from girls, it reinforces the idea that
they only need to care about a girl’s looks; if girls only care about other girls’ looks, why would
boys need to think any differently? Girls need to band together to end these stereotypes and
expectations about looks, not perpetuate them.
The second reason these comments are even more harmful is that they turn girls against each
other. It seems that from a very early age, girls learn that other girls are competition, and making
fun of or spreading rumors about other girls is a way to get ahead in the game. Girls even see
this, when they talk about how frustrating it is that boys seem to be able to be friends with each
other without any problems, and girls that are friends with mainly boys enjoy the “lack of drama”
that comes with it. But even though many girls know about the problem, it never changes. Girls
still feel the need to cut each other down, they think that making someone else feel or be seen as
worse will make them feel or be seen as better. And when younger girls see older ones in this
competition, they learn that it is completely acceptable to interact with other girls in this way.
Being a girl should be about working together, not competing over everything and using insults
and hatred to get ahead.
Girl on girl hate is incredibly harmful to not only the girls receiving the insults, but to girls
everywhere. Girls should feel free to look they way they want, and not need to put down and hurt
each other to gain worth. We need to to start caring for other girls instead of competing, and
work together to end the girl on girl hate.